i really never expect myself to get gastric.
until today only i realise the symptoms i always get isn't bloated stomach
it's because i got gastric and i starve for quite a long time.
for a person like me
not eating for nearly 20 hours is really a lot.
usually not eating for three hours
is already like dying for food.
but this time.
20 hours. no kidding.
i didn't do this purposely.
i'm really a person that will eat no matter what.
happy, sad. angry, excited.
but this time.
i'm really disappointed that i starved myself.
when i tweet germaine that i'm gonna starve myself.
in my brain, i told myself
"what? i must be kidding!"
but in my heart, it said
"yes. i'm really hurt. i don't have enough energy to digest any food. so don't eat"
yeah. that's why happened.
i really took care of our relationship.
and this is all i get.
heart pain.
uncountable tears.
gastric that follow me forever.
i don't even dare to tell my mum.
i know she will be worry about me.
she had trusted me on my diet.
i don't want to let her down.
just pretend that i eat something wrong.
i think it's also due to the damn heavy pressure.
i know it's o-level.
well what to do?
now i can't be on diet by starving.
that what's i used to do.
but i didn't hurt myself.
yeah.
i guess this is what i get for being 'stubborn' for a one way relationship.
